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My husband and I have been married for almost 20 years. We met at work and I started “dating” him when I was 19 years old. There were people that said our relationship would never last, but almost 23 years later we proved them wrong. Being married for so long is wonderful, of course, it has it’s challenging days but there are more wonderful days. Often times when people hear that we’ve been married for so long they ask how we do it. While I know my husband and I are not the perfect couple we try and live by these 10 tips on keeping your marriage strong.
While my marriage is not always rainbows and butterflies, I can say there are more happy moments than not. We are definitely not the perfect couple and we fight and argue like school children but we do strive to keep our marriage strong.
10 Tips on Keeping Your Marriage Strong
- Don’t always be honest! I’m not saying lie to your spouse but if your spouse looks like crap or their butt looks a little oversized, keep it to yourself. Your spouse has most likely looked in the mirror and does not need to be reminded how they look.
- Care about your appearance. Too often in long relationships, we tend to become very comfortable. We stop caring about how we dress, our hair, our weight and more. It’s important that we care about how we look not only for ourselves but for the one we married.
- Pamper one another. Take care of each other. Make each other dinner, get each other a drink, let each other relax and so on. When you pamper your spouse it shows them that you are willing to take time out of your day to care for them and that you are thinking of them.
- Someone has to have the last word. Remember how I said that my husband and I sometimes fight like school children? I feel like when we bicker, we each insist on having the last word. Often times in an effort to make the mad bickering stop, I simply stop talking and allow him to have the last word. It’s hard but worth it.
- Laugh! Whether it’s retelling funny stories from the past or watching a funny movie, it feels so good to laugh, especially with the one you love.
- Show affection. Without expectations, it’s okay to snuggle, hold each other, spoon, give one another a back massage and not expect a ‘happy ending’.
- Put your phone down. Talk!!! Give one another attention.
- Go on dates. Even if you have kids and cannot afford a sitter, you can still go on dates. Schedule an evening ‘in’ once the kids go to bed, take an afternoon off work or find a friend to ‘parent swap’ with.
- Do something your partner enjoys. Consider learning or trying something your significant other enjoys. This will not only bring the two of you together but it may introduce you to something you actually like.
- Listen! Listen to your spouse. Too often we become busy and often times put our kids before our spouse. One day sooner than we hope, our kids will become adults and start their own family, so it’s important that we listen to our spouse and focus on them, their thoughts and their needs.
When you meet a couple that has been married for many years take the time to ask them how they have made their marriage work. A successful marriage will only be successful if you work at it. You have to go through everyday challenges and struggles with dedication from parties. You can have a successful and strong marriage.
Do you have any tips on keeping your marriage strong?
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I don’t agree with the first two points at all. At. All. Also, the grammar in the first paragraph needs a little work.
Signed, the one who finally found someone who could appreciate her for being exactly who she was (not caring about appearance) and who could handle the honesty.