13 Reasons Why Teens Need Their Parents to Be in Their Business

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If you are a parent or a school official, then you need to make sure that you watch 13 Reasons Why on Netflix. It is based on the book written by Jay Asher. You can find the book on Amazon, here.

As a parent, I recommend that you and your kids read this book. 13 Reasons Why tells the story of a young girl that commits suicide and leaves behind a box of tapes that tell her story and her justification for doing it.

For a parent, this is a hard series to watch because as adults we cannot always relate to what our kids may be going through because of the change in times from when we were in school. Throughout the time I was watching 13 Reasons Why, I came to realize just how important it is for parents to be in their child’s business.

After raising 3 teenagers, I learned a lot, so in an effort to help other parents with teens, I wrote What Not to do When Raising a Teenage Daughter. Of course, the tips from this post can be used even if you have a son.

Sadly, I got a little bit of heat from a few readers, but after watching and really analyzing the message behind 13 Reasons Why, I stand behind this post and believe that everything I suggested is very important in order to try and protect your teen.

Kids and some parents would not agree with me, but parents need to be in their teen’s business. In actuality, parents should be in the business of their kids no matter how old or young they are.

I thought I would share some ways that, as a parent, you can be in your child’s business in a positive way:

1. When your child is not home, clean their room. My girls know that I do random room cleaning and it is always unexpected. This is my way to not only clean their room and organize their room but it’s also a good way to find any ‘forgotten’ notes or papers that they may have left lying around.
2.  If you are going to allow your kids to have social media accounts, which in my opinion, you shouldn’t, but if you are then it is important that you have access to their passwords and that you periodically check on their account along with what their mutual friends are doing on their accounts. Of course, if your child knows that you have access to their account, they will most likely create a new account so make sure that you use your common sense and do detailed searches.  
3. Communicate with your child’s teachers. No matter how well your child does at school, know their teachers and communicate with all of their teachers at least once a month. I have always considered my kid’s teachers a parent figure for my children, so their input is very important.
4. Know your kid’s friends. Allow your kids to have friends over to hang out and while they are over at your house, get to know them. Talk to their friends, ask them questions about their family and their personal interests. I’ve noticed over the years that kids like to talk about themselves and this is a great way to get to know them and what their beliefs are.
5. Know the parents of your kid’s friends, have them over for dinner, and really get to know them. If you form a bond with the parents of who your child is hanging out with it will open the doors of communication and will hopefully help with each parent being comfortable enough to go to one another if there is a concern about each other’s child.
6. You need to actually listen to your child when they talk to you. It’s not often that a teenager will openly talk to their parents about life, so stop what you are doing, put your phone down and listen. The keyword is to listen. Do not overly question your child so that they begin to feel uncomfortable and stop talking, simply listen.
7. Create a Dropbox account that will store all of the pictures and videos that your child takes with their phone. Pictures speak a thousand words.
8. Do not allow your child to have 100% access to their phone. Set a phone limit and have a designated spot that your child will place their phone to charge it. This also allows you to peruse their phone, apps, texts, etc.. to make sure that there are no obvious red flags.
9. Take your teen and a friend to dinner. Food creates conversation.
10. Chaperone and/or volunteer at their school. Depending on your child, this may cause more harm than good, but it’s just an idea.

To most parents, our kids are our world, and it is our job to protect them by any means necessary, even if it means being in their business. As a parent, you might think that your child should have privacy and to an extent, I would agree with you, but since children’s brains are not completely formed and are still growing, it’s our job to make sure that they stay in a good place, make good decisions and that we are there when they mess up and need us. Don’t forget, to take the time to watch or read 13 Reasons Why and then consider re-watching it with your kids.